Opinions of a Wolf

The King of Rock and Roll’s first (and only) wife’s controversial memoir of their time together.

Summary:
Decades after his death, millions of fans continue to worship Elvis the legend. But very few knew him as Elvis the man. Here in her own words, Priscilla Presley tells the story of their love, revealing the details of their first meeting, their marriage, their affairs, their divorce, and the unbreakable bond that has remained long after his tragic death.

Review:
I picked up my library system’s only copy of this book in preparation for the A24 movie coming out this fall directed by Sofia Coppola. I am absolutely dying to see the movie, and I thought I should have read the memoir first. Now, this memoir is pretty controversial, especially in the Elvis fan crowd (who I count myself among.) So my review will be in three parts. First looking at the book as a memoir compared to other memoirs. Second, my thoughts on certain aspects of Elvis and Priscilla as she presents them in the book. Third, looking at the controversies.

As a memoir, this starts out very strong with Priscilla finding out about Elvis’s death, then we immediately get a flashback to when she met him in Germany. The first two-thirds of the book are engaging and engrossing. I could barely put it down. It was an easy read that made me want to know more. I also felt in this portion of the book that Priscilla was giving a fairly even hand to both herself and to Elvis. She was being relatively straightforward about everyone’s strengths and shortcomings. Unlike modern memoirs, which often eschew using dialogue with direct quotes, this is written more like a story with snippets of dialogue sprinkled throughout. This made it more readable but also less believable, because who really remembers exactly what people said decades ago? And I don’t believe that something being a pinnacle moment in your life makes it more likely for you to remember the exact words. I don’t remember my wedding vows I wrote without going to reread them.

The strengths present in the first two-thirds of the memoir are lacking in the last third. Priscilla glosses over big moments in the marriage without much reflection or insight. For example, the first time she has an affair, she essentially just says…then I had an affair. I don’t need the details of the sexual aspect of the affair, but some reflection as to what was the first touch that crossed the line, what made her willing to take the risk to have an affair (especially given how whole-heartedly she’d committed herself to the quest to be Mrs. Presley), etc… There are large swathes of time also that are communicated in just a few sentences. Perhaps distance and time was needed to be able to fully process everything that had happened. Perhaps she should have waited until more time had passed to allow for more meaningful reflection on these years. In any case, the last third of the book almost reads like a different book than the first two-thirds. Or like a different pair of authors wrote it.

Second, here are some things that were newly revealed to me in this read as an Elvis fan that I didn’t know before and that some research confirms seem to be accepted as true. Elvis talked a form of baby talk in his intimate relationships. (This has been confirmed by other women he was romantically involved with). Priscilla says this was similar to how Elvis spoke with his mother Gladys. I’m sure a lot of people speak in a special way with their significant other (look at how “bae” has entered the lexicon). I guess I’m just surprised that these women were willing to talk about it. I also learned that Priscilla suggested that Elvis burn his philosophy books after the Colonel ordered him to back off on it. Elvis acquiesced and did so. Earlier, he had told Priscilla that his soul mate would be interested in the things that interested him, even though she had no interest in the philosophy books at all. Both of these situations show how emotionally immature the two of them were in dealing with each other. Instead of building a healthy relationship built on two separate individuals who mutually respect each other, they each had strong expectations of how the other would behave. Priscilla didn’t want Elvis the spiritual guru. She wanted Elvis the rock star. Elvis didn’t want Priscilla to have a life of her own in addition to her life with him. He wanted her to be a side-kick at his beck-and-call.

Of course, the relationship started off on the wrong foot. Which leads me right into the controversies. I knew going into this that Priscilla was 14 and Elvis 24 when they met and began their relationship. Some fans think this is no big deal. Others think Elvis groomed Priscilla. Certainly passages in the book sound very much like grooming.

When we met, I had just turned fourteen. The first six months I spent with him were filled with tenderness and affection. Blinded by love, I saw none of his faults or weaknesses. He was to become the passion of my life. He taught me everything: how to dress, how to walk, how to apply makeup and wear my hair, how to behave, how to return love–his way. Over the years he became my father, husband, and very nearly God.

page 15

I find the folks who defend Elvis by talking about how they think Priscilla manipulated her way into being Mrs. Presley to be honestly abhorrent. She was ten years his junior and just 14 years old when they met. Even if we imagine that Priscilla was a super-fan hoping to be Mrs. Presley, as the adult in the situation who was also mega-famous and rich, he had all the power. Did Elvis really feel a true connection with Priscilla (that he should have ignored as she wasn’t an adult yet), or did he just identify a teenager he could partially raise into being exactly the type of wife he wanted? No one will ever know that for sure. Only Elvis knows. But I think it’s absolutely clear that the way in which the relationship started made it impossible for them to have a healthy marriage.

Some people say that Priscilla lies throughout the book. The main source of these accusations seems to be from Suzanne Finstad’s book Child Bride. She says she has recordings of interviews with Priscilla in which she admits to exaggerating in her memoir, but these tapes have not been released so no one can verify this. Priscilla won a defamation lawsuit against Currie Grant for his claims in this book but, interestingly, never sued Suzanne Finstad or the publisher. I haven’t read this book but I do think if the author has interviews with Priscilla backing up what the book says it would be interesting for her to release them.

At the end of the day, this memoir is an engaging read that further highlights aspects of Elvis that other biographies and memoirs I’ve read agree on. He kept a completely flipped schedule (up at night and asleep in the day) facilitated by downers and uppers. He had a short temper and yet was a consummate professional and a gentleman when he was working. He was almost always surrounded by his entourage. He never got over the death of his mother. The Colonel controlled his career in such a way that he didn’t get to pursue the artistic work he wanted to, and yet, he also allowed the Colonel to control these things because he was afraid of what would happen if he lost the fame and the ability to make the money. All in all an interesting entry in the mosaic that makes up outsider perspectives on what Elvis was like, a man who left behind no journals and very few letters.

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4 out of 5 stars

Length: 320 pages – average but on the longer side

Source: Library

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