Friday Fun! (Restaurant Work, Updates)

October 7, 2011 3 comments

Hello my lovely readers!  It’s been a crazy week on the blog with everything from the Nigerian Lit Reading/Reviewing Project to white trash zombies to a smack-down with a rude author. Phew!  And that was just one tiny part of my life, lol.

This was my first full week working my new part-time job at the restaurant.  Due to the new schedule, I can only do the gym 3 days a week instead of 5. I was worried this would lead to me losing ground on my get fit challenge, but that is clearly not to be the case.  My restaurant shifts involve running around like a chicken with my head cut off for anywhere from 4 to 6 hours, and if anything I’ve seen my metabolism increase from more expended energy.  And that’s just the regular shifts!  I’ve also had shifts involving “guerilla marketing” or what my co-worker calls “menu bombing.”  If you live in a city, you know what this entails.  Running around residential neighborhoods leaving menus in mailboxes, on porches, and on cars.  I had no idea how many steps are on Boston porches until I climbed them for two hours. Holy shit, Batman!  It was like getting paid to do the stairmaster.  (If you can’t tell, I’m happy about this).  I love my part-time job!  Plus they feed me dinner most shifts.  Since it’s a healthy restaurant, that means free healthy food, yay!

The classic fall New England weather is here, which means crisp air and frosty mornings.  Halloween decorations are up all over the city, and I clearly need to start work on figuring out my Halloween costume.  My co-worker last night suggested I could pull off being Lara Croft, and I absolutely LOVE the idea, so I’m thinking that may be it.  But shhh, don’t tell!

I’m really hoping to finish up the first draft of Tova Gallagher 2 this weekend, so I can get to editing my zombie book!  I can’t wait to get more of my writing out to you guys.  Be sure to check in tomorrow for the discussion of the next book in The Real Help Reading Project (it’s my favorite that we’ve read so far).

Tonight I’m doing yoga and hopefully seeing some friends.  Happy weekends all!

Book Review: Symphony of Blood by Adam Pepper

October 5, 2011 1 comment

Bald man with red eyes.Summary:
Hank Mondale wanted to be a cop but his gambling, alcohol, and drug addictions ruined his record.  Instead, he is now a private detective barely scraping by, so when a wealthy and famous man named Blake hires him to figure out where the monster pursuing his daughter is hiding out, he takes the case in spite of the odd sound of it.  Particularly since Blake and his daughter insist that this is a literal, shape-changing, lizard-like monster after her.

Review:
This is a book that suffers from bad structure, a plethora of unlikable characters, and a serious lack of editing.

I don’t need to go into too much detail about the lack of editing.  Suffice to say it’s a combination of grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors.  For instance, Jaeger is spelled “Yager” at one point (when being spoken about by an alcoholic character, no less).  Also, although most of the book is told in past tense, periodically present tense shows up.  Similarly, other errors show up that simply jar the reader, such as calling a character “rippled,” when the author meant “ripped.”

These are all editing problems, though, so I always try to look beyond them to see if they were fixed, would the story be a quality one?  Alas, the case in this instance is simply no.  The first half of the book is told entirely from the detective’s point of view, only to abruptly switch and have the next 25% or so back-track and tell what occurred from the monster’s perspective.  Then the last bit of the book reverts back to the detective’s perspective.  This gives the book an incredibly odd structure and simultaneously removes most of the mystery and suspense.  Where before the creature was an enigma, we now understand it intimately.  Similarly, whereas the section told from the creature’s point of view could be an interesting story in its own right, it is instead smushed between two ho-hum detective sections.  Either choose to be investigating the monster or be the monster or alternate more quickly between the two to maintain some mystery.  This structure simply feels like two different books willy-nilly slammed together.

There’s also the problem of the characters.  The only sympathetic one is the monster, which would work if the story was told entirely from the monster’s perspective, yet it is not.  Plus the monster itself just doesn’t make much sense.  It’s hard to picture or imagine how it operates.  It seems the author used the excuse of it being a monster to let it bend all rules whenever it was convenient to the storyline.  Beyond the monster, the detective, his friends, Blake, and the daughter are all completely unsympathetic.  They are the kind of people you’d move away from on the subway or roll your eyes at behind their backs.  Readers, particularly in a mystery, need at least one character they can relate to.

All that said, Pepper does have some writing abilities.  He clearly has a creative mind and is capable of telling a story one can follow.  This would be a good draft, but not a final published work.  He needs to decide if he wants to tell the monster’s story or the detective’s, then rewrite entirely from that point of view and also invest in an editor.  If these steps are followed, Pepper could have a solid book here.  As it stands now, though, I can’t in good faith recommend it to anyone, even staunch horror fans.

2 out of 5 stars

Source: Copy from the author in exchange for my honest review

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Book Review: My Life as a White Trash Zombie by Diana Rowland

October 3, 2011 9 comments
Image of a digital book cover. A white woman with a gray tint to her skin has a white mohawk with pink tint on the ends. Blood drips from her mouth. She has a tattoo on her arm.

Summary:
Angel wakes up in the hospital to discover she was found naked and overdosed on drugs on the the side of the road in her small town after a fight with her boyfriend, Randy.  Someone mysteriously drops off medicinal energy drinks along with a note that she must work loyally for at least a month at a job newly acquired for her at the city morgue.  A high school drop-out living with her alcoholic and periodically abusive father, Angel decides that she should seize this opportunity.  It certainly helps that pills and alcohol no longer seem to do anything for her.  As her oddly gloppy energy drinks start to run out, though, Angel finds herself having cravings for something found in the morgue–brains.

Review:
I bought the kindle edition of this book the instant it came out as a birthday present to myself for two reasons.  First, the title is amazing.  Second, look at that cover!  Yeah, the whole thing just screamed my named.  My instincts were right, too.

It’s been a long time since I read a book that hits all the elements I love in literature like this one–urban fantasy style horror, a setting that rings familiar to me, a completely relatable main character, and a fun love interest.  It’s a world that’s simultaneously familiar and special, which is what makes urban fantasy fun.  Angel’s world of trailers, beer cans, and nothing to do reminds me a lot of my childhood growing up in Vermont.  On the other hand, Angel has cravings for brains.  And she somehow manages to keep this a secret in a small town, certainly a monumental task.

Angel’s problems are a combination or fantastical ones (must find brains to survive) and completely real world ones (a history of an abusive mother and a father with alcoholism).  Angel has a lot to overcome even before she gets zombified, but the zombification adds an element of distance that allows tough things to be talked about without that dragging down dullness often found in literary fiction.

Rowland reworks the zombie trope without completely removing the essentials of a zombie.  Angel can function in day to day life as long as she has brains once every two days or so.  If she doesn’t have them though, her senses slowly dull and she gradually turns into the lurching monster simply desiring brains that we all know from the classic zombie movies.  This really works, because it allows Angel to be a part of society, yet still be the monster we’ve all grown to know and love.

That said, I will say that I am getting a bit tired of the monsters surviving by working in a morgue trope.  I wish Rowland had come up with something a bit more creative for how Angel gets her hands on brains than that.  It’s starting to seem like the staff of the morgues in all of urban fantasy consist entirely of monsters and sociopaths.  Thinking more outside the box would have made me love the book instead of really liking it.

Overall, this zombie book gave me thrills, chills, and laughs galore, but it also brought me close to tears.  It’s genre fiction with a heart, and I highly recommend it to anyone willing to see zombies (or white trash) in a whole new light.

If you found this review helpful, please consider tipping me on ko-fi, checking out my digital items available in my ko-fi shop, buying one of my publications, or using one of my referral/coupon codes. Thank you for your support!

4 out of 5 stars

Length: 320 pages – average but on the longer side

Source: Purchased

Buy It (Amazon or Bookshop.org)

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Book Review: Purple Hibiscus by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (Nigerian Independence Day Reading/Reviewing Project)

September 30, 2011 13 comments

Cover of the book Purple HibiscusSummary:
Kambili’s father, Eugene, is a wealthy businessman and newspaperman focused on telling the truth of the upheaval in Nigeria, but even more focused on his fanatical version of Catholicism.  Kambili, her brother Jaja, and their mother all live on edge, walking on eggshells, never knowing when he might snap.  In contrast, Eugene’s sister, Kambili’s Aunty Ifeoma, is a university professor and a widow, cheerfully raising her children to be independent.  One winter vacation Aunty Ifeoma convinces Eugene to allow Kambili and Jaja to visit.  A visit that will change their worlds forever.

Review:
You all know by now that I’m good friends with Amy, so when she asked me to participate in her one-shot project, I couldn’t say no.  Although, I was completely at a loss as to what to read.  I’ve never read a Nigerian book before.  So I asked Amy to help me figure out a book to get my hands on, and she recommended this title to me.

Adichie instantly swept me into a world that is starkly different from, yet surprisingly similar to, my own.  The excessive religion and fear of god was something I was raised with myself, so I found myself instantly connecting to Kambili.  Indeed, it’s nearly impossible not to connect to her.  She is intelligent yet vulnerable.  Strong yet terrified.  Wise yet naive.  She is an ideal main character, because she is so essentially human yet impossible not to root for.

Kambili’s father is an abuser; there is zero doubt about that, yet the perspective of the abused is so eloquently depicted by Adichie.  Kambili truly loves her father.  She is afraid of him and hurt by him, yet she knows there are good things too.  She wants nothing more than to please him.  She lives for his kind words.  Indeed, even the reader sees that there are good aspects to Eugene in spite of the fact that he’s a horrible abuser.  He routinely donates money to the needy in Nigeria, for instance.  This is what makes it so powerful and realistic.  Abusers aren’t monsters from a fairy tale.  They are deeply flawed people who hurt those closest to them.

In contrast to Eugene is Aunty Ifeoma.  Aunty Ifeoma is the kind of woman that I believe most modern, strong, educated women want to be.  She tries so damn hard to help her kids be strong, to be a good mom, to help save her sister-in-law and niece and nephew from an abusive situation.  She tries hard at everything, yet sometimes the civil unrest at the university and the constant struggle to feed her family gets to her, and she snaps a bit.  Aunty Ifeoma is the perfect comparison to Eugene.  She sometimes snaps at her kids a bit when she’s tired or frustrated from the extreme situations going on around her Nigeria, but she never harms them.  Since stress is one of the excuses many abusers use, it is excellent to see this comparison within the story.

Adichie eloquently describes Nigeria as well.  I’ve never been to any part of Africa, but I felt myself swept into the hot, dry air.  I could almost smell the food they ate and the cashews and oranges on the ground outside.  Although Adichie shows the political unrest and civil strife, she also clearly displays the beauty of Nigeria, which is something I’ve never encountered before.

With all this beauty and realism, then, I must say I was a bit thrown by the ending.  It almost felt as if it was from a different story.  Whereas most of the book was reserved and eloquent in its simple depictions, the ending felt larger than life.  I think I was hoping for something more from the ending.  Some type of realistic understanding of a tough situation instead of a….deus ex machina style ending.

That said, I am incredibly glad I read this book.  I’m glad Amy helped me broaden my horizons to reading from a style of lit outside of my normal comfort zone.  This book is incredibly accessible, and I highly recommend it to anyone who is a fan of contemporary, literary stories.

4 out of 5 stars

Source: Public Library

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Friday Fun! (Things I Did This Week)

September 30, 2011 4 comments

Hello my lovely readers!  I’ve been up to quite a lot this week:

Like, I read a book for Amy’s Nigerian Independence Day reading project (post will be up later today).

I decided that I desperately need more money flowing into my bank account, so I found a part-time job at a local restaurant.  I already had my first shift and really enjoyed myself.

I went out for beers to watch the Sox with my downstairs neighbor. We will not discuss the outcome of the game. *coughs*

I discovered that there are free games on Google+!! And I found this amazeballs game called City of Wonder, which is kind of like SimCity, only you’re building a civilization, and you get to attack other civs.  It’s seriously good times.

I bought two pairs of jeans for the first time in like five years. I am now fit enough that they’re semi-comfortable and look cute!

I’ve been working my patootie off on Tova 2.  Hopefully the draft should be done by the end of this weekend.

Oh, and I co-wrote a guest post with my friend on her blog.  If you have any curiosity about the snarky librarian side of my life, feel free to check it out.

This weekend I’m going to Salem with my friend Sara, working a shift at the restaurant, hopefully bathing the cat (and not dying), doing some yoga, and just generally being my busy, awesome self. Happy weekends!

Book Review: The Lady in the Lake by Raymond Chandler

September 26, 2011 8 comments

Book cover featuring a tumbler of whiskey.Summary:
Everyone’s favorite hard-boiled private eye Marlowe is back, and this time he’s been hired to track down a respectable entrepreneur’s wild wife.  She sent a telegram weeks ago stating she was going to marry her boy toy, Lavery, but Lavery was spotted in Hollywood and claims to have no idea where Mrs. Kingsley is.  The last place she was known to be was at the Kingsleys’ lake-side country cottage, so that small town is where Marlowe starts his investigation.

Review:
I first encountered Chandler in a film noir class I took in undergrad.  Ok, so that class was my first encounter with noir too, but it introduced a whole new genre to me to fall in love with. So whenever I stumble upon a Chandler book in a used bookstore, I absolutely must buy it.  There’s simply no question.  This will probably continue until I have collected them all.

The entries are always narrated by Marlowe, and The Lady in the Lake does not fail to smoothly represent everything there is to love about him.  He’s darkly cynical yet possesses a striking wit even in the face of getting a beat-down from the cops (which happens in pretty much every book.  Lots of dirty cops in Marlowe’s world).  Without Marlowe’s voice and ever-present intelligence, the books would not be what they are.  Thankfully, his presence is just as perfect here as in the other Chandler books.

So what about the story?  Well, this time the story is not set entirely in LA.  A solid half of it is in the countryside.  While I enjoyed those scenes, I must admit I did miss the LA grittiness a bit.  Although the scene where the grieving husband drags his wife’s corpse out of the lake on his back was every bit as gritty as any city scene.

The mystery made so much sense in the end that I was kicking myself for not figuring it out.  I still can’t believe I didn’t figure it out!  How Chandler came up with these twists and turns and managed to write them without giving it away is beyond me.  I doubt anyone will be disappointed with the mystery.  I literally had no idea what was going on into Marlowe explained everything in the classic film noir wrap-up scene.

The femme fatale was a weak point in this entry, however.  I think this is why I really liked it but didn’t love it.  She just didn’t seem sexy enough.  Violent, yes.  Brutal, yes.  But sexy? Ehhhh.  Personally I always perceive the femme fatale as a gorgeous black widow spider, and well this one just failed a bit on the gorgeous glamor aspect.  She was still a femme fatale, but perhaps a bit disappointing.

Overall, I truly enjoyed my time in Marlowe’s world with this entry.  Marlowe is someone whose presence it is always worth being in, regardless of whether his surroundings are perfect or not.  I recommend this to noir fans, highly.  Those new to the genre, I recommend start with The Big Sleep.

4 out of 5 stars

Source:  Harvard Books used book cellar

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Book Review: Labor of Love, Labor of Sorrow by Jacqueline Jones (The Real Help Reading Project)

September 24, 2011 11 comments

Black woman working in the fields.Summary:
Professor Jacqueline Jones presents the extensively researched history of the dual working worlds of black American women–at home and in the workforce–from slavery to present.  She highlights the ways in which the unique cultural history of slavery as well as being subject to both sexism and racism have impacted black American women’s lives.

Discussion:
This is the second book for the Real Help reading project I’m co-hosting with Amy.  I specifically requested that she host the discussion for this book for a special reason.  Jacqueline Jones was my professor for one of my classes required for my history major at Brandeis University (she now teaches at University of Texas), and suffice to say, she and I did not get along very well.  I was concerned that this history might make it difficult for me to discuss this book, so I asked Amy to host.  She obliged.  I am going to do my best to discuss this book without bias, but my personal experiences with Jackie Jones (as the Brandeisians called her) definitely gave me my own perspective in reading the book.

I was completely engrossed in the slavery and Jim Crow sections of the book.  They taught me a lot I was previously unaware of, as I always kind of avoided the Civil War in my American history classes.  (I focused on colonization, Revolutionary War, westward expansion, and WWII).  For instance, it was interesting to see how the matriarchy slave owners forced upon slaves affected and impacted black culture even to this day.  It was also the first time I saw sharecropping explained and spelled out.  It is easy to see how black women, particularly ones widowed or single mothers, would choose to move to a city and become domestic help to escape the back-breaking work of share-cropping.

The book also demonstrates how black American culture has come to depend upon the iconic image of the strong black woman to help them through horrible racism and working conditions.  Yet, by the end of the book, we can see that this means a lack of support for black women that is reflected in long-term illnesses and mental illness.  Although black women are to be respected and lauded for their role in helping their communities, it is time that less is laid upon them.  One obvious thing?  Less time spent serving whites.

Since this was read largely to combat The Help, which takes place specifically in a domestic environment during the Civil Rights movement, I want to take a moment to discuss what I learned about that specific era in this book, because the book as a whole obviously covers a very large period of time.  The book clearly demonstrates that the Civil Rights movement was BLACK women fighting for BLACK people and sympathetic whites came down from the north to help with things like voter registration, and they were then housed by BLACK women who would literally sit on their porch with a gun to protect the workers.  This is in stark contrast to the image laid out in The Help where a WHITE woman comes and convinces the black workers to talk to her for their rights.

Additionally, the book repeatedly demonstrates how black women constantly throughout American history have sought to get out of white homes for any other kind of labor (except in the case of sharecropping).  The role of domestic simply rings too close to slavery, and can you blame them?  It certainly is apparent that many, if not the majority, of white employers sought to use black domestics as as close an approximation to slave labor as possible.  One issue I don’t think the book addressed well enough is that any situation where one is working as a servant in another person’s home serves to antagonize relationships between the two groups.  There is no friendliness there.  One person is doing a menial chore in the home of another that the other is wealthy enough to not have to do.  How could that possibly bring about anything but negative feelings?

Now, ok, here’s my criticism of the book.  I feel that in Prof Jones’ passion for the plight of minorities in the US, she can sometimes over-compensate the opposite direction.  By that I mean, she sometimes presents minorities as super-human or at no fault for their own actions or she’ll ignore negatives entirely.  For instance, we only got two paragraphs out of 480 pages on black women working in prostitution.  Personally, I wanted to know more about this, as it is a type of work black women have engaged in (as have every color/race of women ever), and I wanted to know the specific roles sexism, racism, and a hostile culture played in that for them.  Specifically, I was interested about how the idea of lighter colored black women being more desirable to white men that we saw in the first book of our challenge might have carried over to prostitution in the 1920s and 1930s.  But Jones doesn’t talk about this, and from my own personal experience with her, I speculate this is partly a blinders on her eyes issue.

Similarly, one thing that really irritated me was every time Jones tells a story of a woman working herself to the bone trying to provide for her children only to have her husband abandon her, Jones excuses the man by saying….”Well…..racism,” and moves on.  Certainly, I am sure that some of these men were simply stressed out and thus abandoned their families, but I’m also certain that some of them were just assholes and would have done so in a completely non-racist society.  To wit, I believe Jones falls too hardly on the nurture side of nature/nurture, when psychiatry has repeatedly demonstrated that it actually is a combination of the two that determines an individual’s behavior.  By this I mean, I am certain that a non-racist society would lead to a larger percentage of happy, healthy families, but it by no means would wipe out all questionable behavior by all members of that race.  To suggest that all members of a race would be “good” minus racism is just as racist as to suggest that all members of a race are “bad.”

That said, while I enjoyed the earlier portions of the book, as well as the sections on domestic labor in the 1950s and 1960s, I do think the book tries to tackle a bit too much in one entry.  The sweep is almost overwhelming at times when reading it.  I’d recommend getting a print copy so you can skim for the chapters of most interest to you or so that you can read various sections as questions arise.

Source: Amazon

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Please head over to Amy’s post to discuss this book!

Friday Fun! (Real Search Terms People Have Used To Find My Blog)

September 23, 2011 8 comments

Hello my lovely readers!  I hope you all had good weeks.  Mine was rather long as I a) found out I didn’t get a job I really wanted and b) had dental surgery that seems to *still* have not fixed the problem.  But!  Life goes on, and I have good friends, a fun city, a snuggly kitty, and an adorable apartment to live in.  So all will be well.

Today I thought I’d give you a little insight into the behind-the-scenes here at Opinions of a Wolf, not to mention the psyche of our fellow Earthlings, and show you some actual search terms people have used to find my blog.  Offered with commentary, naturally.

  • seitan fondue (4 hits)
    Wow, this is…..rather brilliant, actually.  I suddenly have this urge to make seitan and fondue and EAT ALL THE THINGS.
  • marge piercy woman on the edge of time chapter summaries (4 hits)
    Hello, students. Sorry, I’m afraid you four are going to actually have to read the book if you want such detailed summary. It’s a good one! You’ll enjoy it!  I’ll even give you a metaphorical cookie for reading it.
  • jondalar cheats (5 hits)
    Oh, fellow fans of the Earth’s Children series. I regret to inform you that yes, it is true. Jondalar does cheat on Ayla.  I hope my review saved you from having to read the god-awful last book in the series.
  • to say nothing of the dog movie (5 hits)
    Wait! Is this happening?!?! *googles* No. No, it is not happening. Brilliant idea though, fellow Connie Willis fans.
  • urbmon 116 (5 hits)
    To clarify, this is a key building in a tiny, not super-well known scifi book that I’m always trying to get people to read entitled The World Inside by Robert Silverburg, so I’m rather baffled as to why people are googling the urbmon?  Where are they hearing about this?  Why are they googling it as opposed to the name of the book?  Inquiring minds want to know.
  • become a wolf leave comment (5 hits)
    ….what? No, really, what?  Let me clarify things for you, googlers who I really hope are delusional teenagers who need more to do.  You cannot become a wolf.  That is not possible.  That is a thing we call fantasy.
  • image of female great plains wolf howling (2 hits)
    So…..two people needed an image of a great plains wolf howling, but it *had* to be female? Why does the gender matter?
  • saraha desert (2 hits)
    You might have better luck if you listen to google and change your spelling to sahara, since there is no saraha desert. You’re welcome.
  • gross factors about the centipede (3 hits)
    *head hits desk giggling* Oh, something tells me my post about The Human Centipede was not the gross thing they were looking for.
  • siluet wolf (1 hit)
    *face-palm*
  • i’m poor and boring (1 hit)
    Boohoo. Get off the internet and go read something or go for a run or something.
  • sparknotes for revolution is not a dinner party (1 hit)
    Apparently this is being assigned in classes now. It is not a long book, kids, just read it.
  • 1973 boobs (1 hit)
    Ok, why specifically boobs from 1973?  I’m pretty sure boobs from every decade are relatively similar.
  • cute werepanther pictures (1 hit)
    *raises eyebrows*
  • i want to fuck michelle beavan (1 hit)
    I don’t know why you think googling this will get you what you want, but then again, men think catcalling women will make us get in their cars with them, so *shrug*

And there you have it.  We have students trying to avoid reading (JUST READ IT), a few health nuts, and people obsessed with wolves and werewolves.

In all seriousness, though, these hits just show part of the fun of having a blog.  You get a bit of insight into other folks, not to mention get to feel you might not be so weird after all.  I mean, five other people are interested in a building from that obscure scifi book after all……

Happy weekends all!

Categories: Friday Fun! Tags: ,

Book Review: Hunt Beyond the Frozen Fire by Gabriel Hunt (series, #4)

September 21, 2011 3 comments

Terrified woman in front of knife-thrower.Summary:
Gabriel Hunt is independently wealthy and runs around the world saving artifacts, people, etc…  Think Indiana Jones in book form.  In this entry, a hot lady named Velda shows up at his office asking him to help look for her father who’s gone missing in Antarctica.  His last transmission mentions trees, and his colleagues believe he was hallucinating, but Velda wants to save what could be her father’s greatest discovery.  Hunt decides to take the case and assembles a team including his best friend, southern charmer Maximilian, and his ex-girlfriend, a mechanic, which is a bit awkward since he’s now banging Velda.  When the team gets out to the portion of ice Velda’s father was lost around, they fall into a fission in the ice and discover red ice and a tunnel that just may prove Velda’s father wasn’t hallucinating after all.

Review:
This is what pulp fiction should be all about.  This is the kind of book that I finished and immediately contacted multiple friends to tell them the full plot, and then they all wanted to read it for themselves in spite of knowing how it ends.  In fact, knowing the ending made them want to read it more.  This is the kind of book where I hit one particular scene, and my jaw dropped open and I started laughing hysterically and everyone in my work cafeteria turned to look at me.  Basically: this kind of book is why I love pulp fiction and thumb my nose at literary fiction snobs.

Basically, ridiculous things build up and keep happening until suddenly you’re just accepting something in the plot that is INSANELY out there, but in the world the author has created it works.  We go from a murderous knife-throwing gypsy who also sells munitions to a mysterious message from a father who survived the Holocaust to falling into a fission in the ice and not dying to leap-frogging across deadly cold water on ice islands to finding an Amazon style jungle under the ice to being attacked by a giant chicken to being taken hostage by a tribe of Amazon Nazi women.

Yes, you read that right.  Amazon Nazi women.  Most of whom are naturally late teens to early 20s, blond haired, blue eyed, and completely gorgeous. NATURALLY.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. “What, Amanda? You’re doing The Real Help project. You host the MIA Reading Challenge. What the what?” But the thing is, this sort of fiction is just about FUN, and the plot is so ridiculous it’s not like I’m going to go out there and say obviously there are murderous Amazon Nazis in the ice under Antarctica.  Just….no.  It’s overly ridiculous on purpose.  Kind of like old school MTV shows like Room Raiders and Next.  It’s escapist literature.  It knows it’s ridiculous, and that’s ok.  Most of it is not offensive if you have a modicum of a sense of humor.

Of course, just because it’s hilarious and ridiculous doesn’t mean it’ll be everyone’s cup of tea.  It is quite violent.  It probably presses the boundaries of what some people would be ok with reading about sex and violence.  You guys know me and know I don’t really have boundaries for those things though.  To me this would be the perfect read to give a reluctant male reader.  It’s action-packed, fast-paced, and basically a male wet dream.  Obviously that won’t be everyone’s cup of tea.

Essentially if you think that a book version of 007 complete with a village of Amazon Nazis under the ice sounds like one of the best things ever, you’re going to love this book.  If you read that sentence and rolled your eyes or cringed, then yeah, avoid it.  It’s not meant for you.

4 out of 5 stars

Source: I think this was Paperbackswap, but I’m not positive.

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Book Review: The Meowmorphosis by Franz Kafka and Coleridge Cook

September 13, 2011 5 comments

Cat head in suit.Summary:
Gregor Samsa goes to bed and wakes up as an adorable snuggly kitten!  He has trouble making up his mind about anything, though, and is easily distracted by things like dust and canned fish.  Plus, his family clearly are not cat people.

Review:
This is the first Quirk Classic that I’ve read, mainly because all the others were based on classics I don’t like to start with (Jane Austen and Anna Karenina).  However, “The Metamorphosis” is one of my faaaavorite short stories.  Although, I will always insist that Gregor woke up as a grasshopper, not a cockroach.  (I was the only one in my AP English class who thought this.  Whatever).  In spite of its (epically awesome win) name, this actually also incorporates another Kafka story “The Trial,” which I have not read.  Anyway, when this came up as an EarlyReviewer I obviously needed to have a copy.

The main problem with reworking “The Metamorphosis” to be a cat is that, well, cats are adorable and playful and perfectly normal household cats whereas a giant insect is not.  A lot of the depression, ennui, and conflict in the original story comes from Gregor being an insect.  While Cook does a good job showing the internal workings of a cat brain to go with their adorably quirky behavior, the actions of the family are less understandable.  What is up with this family hating on their adorable son?  Why do they lock him away in a room?  What is up with that?  Of course this gets addressed later when Gregor grows to a disturbingly large size and can barely move around.  I couldn’t help but think of that obese cat that was on the news last year.  However, at that point he was sort of just becoming the monster they were treating him as.  Ok, I just read what I wrote, and quite possibly that is the point of the story.  However, while reading it, it certainly bogged me down.

I also have to say that I didn’t like the illustrations that went with the story.  Somehow, the illustrator actually managed to make pictures of cats that I didn’t squee over.  There’s something wrong with that picture.

Overall I’d say that I don’t feel like I wasted my time reading this, per se, but I also sort of wish I’d just re-read “The Metamorphosis” and hunted down a copy of “The Trial.”  As someone who can be a bit of an emo reader at times, nothing beats Kafka’s brand of ennui and depression.  Why brighten it up with a kitty?  Just…..why?

I’d recommend this book to that odd juxtaposition of reader who loves depressing European lit and doesn’t mind it being brightened up by an adorable kitty.  I think only you will know if that describes you.

3 out of 5 stars

Source:  Free copy from the publisher via LibraryThing’s EarlyReviewers in exchange for my honest review

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